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Girl Tribe: Who Have You Allowed Into Your Inner Circle? The Value of True Friendship

"Show me your friends, and I'll tell you who you are" ~ unknown

Such a true statement! Apart from our families, our friends are our closest confidants, the people we spend a lot of time talking and hanging out with. Some of us are lucky and meet our forever-besties during childhood while others meet as adults.

Pregnancy never takes away from my girl time (circa:2016)

True friendship is one where you get each other, protect and help one another. They are the people that want to see you succeed and push you to greatness. True friendship creates a place where you are free to be yourself and have no secrets. These ladies are the ones you go out with and have the best memories together.  The women that although you are not related, you claim them as your sisters! We all need this type of friendship in our lives.

‍80's Babies (circa: 2015)

I have been blessed with the best set of girlfriends! Girls that I grew up with and wouldn’t trade for the world. They keep me sane and are my go-to phone calls at my best and my worst. They push me to do better and keep me focused on my goals. They test my limits by daring me to want more and never be satisfied, and they are always cheering me on all my endeavors, regardless how crazy they may be.

‍The 3 Amigos on our first ever BBS day (circa:2012)

Although we talk to each other at least once a day we do not get to spend as much time with one another unless it’s well planned out in advance. We are all at different stages in our lives and honestly quite busy with work, family, school and just life in general.  In 2012, we decided to start celebrating our friendship by having “BBS day.” BBS is what we call each other and please do not ask me what it stands for because I have been sworn to secrecy. It’s a day where we get together and spend the entire day doing something that will help our mind, body, and soul. Normally, we start our day with something active like a run or a workout class followed by a trip to Red Door Spa to take care of our bodies.  Then we try to catch a show or go to new exhibits in the city to feed our minds and end our day with dinner at a restaurant my foodie girlfriend Mimi finds for us. Some years we are not able to fit everything in as planned and only hit two activates instead of three.

BBS day 2017- Red Door Spa

The reason why I love BBS day is that it’s also a day where we discuss our goals for the year. We picked the first weekend in June to have our day because that gives us six months from the New Year. This is when we discuss where we are with our goals and provides a checkpoint on where we need to be to complete our goals by the end of the year. This portion of BBS day gets saved until after dinner time and is considered the serious part of our day. By doing this, we are all held accountable which helps us stay determined. We also discuss our friendship goals and talk about the good and bad traits we are currently seeing in one another. This year the key takeaway from BBS day was that we were going to start a monthly fund for ourselves and use the money for yearly trips so that going forward, BBS day can occur in different parts of the world. We also promised each other to make more time for one another.

‍All smiles after our annual 'goals session'

I am so very proud of my two best friends- Mimi and Betsy! We are all in the same boat in our career moves and are working on making things happen for ourselves. It’s such an amazing feeling knowing that I am not alone on this journey.

The girls that run together stay together

Ladies, look around yourself and see who you have allowed into your inner circle. Who are you spending your girl time with? Are they people that want you to grow? Do they believe in you and your dreams?  Do they have your back? Do they empower and inspire you to do better and be better? Do you have your BBS? If not, I highly encourage you to surround yourself with like-minded women who get it. I know how hard it can be to find your “tribe”- the women who fully understand you but once you have them, you will be much happier and drama free.

R.M Drake said it best “you’ve got to keep the kind of people that make you feel as if you could achieve the impossible… at any given time”. Always remember that if you want to be empowered, you need to surround yourself with empowering people.

I'd love to hear your girl tribe stories!

Always,

about me

Luwam
A program analyst by day and a blogger by night; my love of fitness, healthy living, and empowering other women started...

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